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Queen of the Universe
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| I'm looking for some ..... |
[Nov. 24th, 2009|09:02 pm] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| |  jealous | ] |
Same old routine. At 6pm, I knock off, I take the bus home, my mum beats me to the kitchen, I rest in my room, and sure enough, shortly after, Daddy calls me to have dinner. It's always same old suspects. Small variety. We can have Lil Baby Bro ard at times, lesser of Adik and always, oh always, Along.
Angah doesn't live with us.
Sofiah's always at work.
After dinner I retreat to my room for an after meal cigg. Like a seasoned smoker. Like now, having my puffs, on my bed. I surf the net, chat with a couple of people, listen to some music. I do a variety of things to tire me properly, so I can sleep instantly.
I hate lying in bed, trying to sleep.
It's lonely.
Today however, despite attempts to save a certain ugly unfavourable situation, which technically has been going on for a couple of weeks already, I'm getting the vibe that everything wants to go wrong, and for a reason.
Look, I don't like being all lemau and masam and then having people ask me why I'm sad. I don't like sadness, I don't like being associated with it. So I smile, I joke, I laugh. I make the best of things, because I care too much other people's feelings.
Maybe I'm naturally hot-tempered, and now I'm just old and with less energy to keep flying into a rage about everything. But it doesn't mean you take full advantage of it and just trample all over me.
Perhaps, I'm just sore that the limelight's on you now. But don't worry, I'm not the type to point blame - it was my bad anyway, for doing it the way I did.
I'm just the plain jane with really hot friends.
I'm sure there's a deeper meaning to that. |
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| With a pinch of salt, please |
[Nov. 24th, 2009|10:58 am] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| |  ditzy | ] |
101 things to do at work, but what am I doing? I am reading horoscope compatibility for *AHEM AHEM* and I. HAHAHA morning daydream indulgence, Sal?
Anyhoos, *AHEM AHEM* is Pisces, which is a water sign (like Cancer). I'm an air sign so Air + Water = RAIN. So are we saying that since it's rainy season it's perfect for our romance?
PERASAN SAK SAL.
Okay, exerpts from astrology.com.au (possibly my favourite horoscope website).
"If you want to bond deeply with Pisces, you’ll need to show them that you understand the deeper aspects of life. Pisces needs to know that you are not completely superficial — initially they may feel you are far too scattered or worldly for them."
What the? Even the horoscope is telling me I should stop being so damn bimbotic.
"Be sensitive to the more receptive side of Pisces and prove to them that you are not all froth and bubble. This means sometimes being silent when you’re together. Doing this will gain the respect of Pisces — and you may learn a little about what lies beneath your conscious (and sometimes chattering) mind."
It's telling me to stfu. Horoscope you are evil.
"Pisces born from 1 March to 10 March are highly emotional and volatile, and are probably a little harder for you to connect with — this is because the Moon and Cancer have sway over them. They are extremely sensitive, so you must constantly monitor what you say and how you say it. They are easily offended."
Damn you Cancerians.
Otay, SNAP SNAP SNAP out of it! There's a whole day ahead, I have work to do, so enough daydreaming already! Perhaps later, I could head down to the library to get that book *AHEM AHEM* was reading. |
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| Snap. |
[Nov. 24th, 2009|01:48 am] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| |  listless | ] |
I only managed this.
I think it's shitty. It makes me feel shitty.
I'm tone deaf.
I'm as good as colour blind.
I have terrible coordination.
And I'm not even skinny and/or pretty.
*throws hairbrush at wall*
But I think, my temper's in better control as I get older compared to then.
Well, at least something.
Better than nothing. |
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| Them artist-artist terkini |
[Nov. 23rd, 2009|11:31 pm] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| |  accomplished | ] |
I have uploaded 106 photos on FB, as behind the scenes shots for the photoshoot we did on Saturday. The whole affair should be synonymous with being tired, for just uploading, tagging and captioning them has drained me out tonight too.
I hope to process a few of them and put it up here. When I say process, I mean work on it on Photoshop from raw shots. The ones on FB, solely uploaded to the comp, resized and uploaded on FB with very minimal descretion. I'm pseudo stupid unlike them macam paham assholes who put up pretty much the contents of their cameras I bet you if batteries and wires could up uploaded, they'd be up in the damn album too.
I could do with a better camera. Soon la ok? |
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| Aiyoooooo |
[Nov. 19th, 2009|07:38 pm] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| | flirty | ] |
My god, there are some roadworks done to the carpark outside my place and BOY IS IT NOISY. They should stop soon, really, it's giving me a headache. It's like a semi screeching sound, kindof high-pitched, and continuous. Fannoying betul.
Right now, I am indulging in a bit of fantasy (again). Seriously, I'm starting to think all this is a bit too much, but it keeps me sane, all of this, it does! I am downloading the Jason Mraz's albums because it keeps playing in my mind, si *AHEM* strumming (or trying to) The Remedy, and not quite getting it, as the others watched him, face in frowned concentration.
"I saw fireworks from the freeway.."
Ya lah boy, bila you and me nak drive on the ECP towards town and then fireworks burst out? BILA EH BILA? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA SAL GILA.
This morning, bus daydream was of that car ride with him and after we sent everyone off, he said to me, "Kerusi tolak blakang sikit la..". I would have loved to, cept that I wasn't in the state to make much movements because it was 6am and I was shit sleepy AND his car was damn bloody cold I was pretty much frozen and frost bitten.
I remember climbing out of the car, with his last words to me, "Okay bye, see you again," and hell I was trying not to fall out and smash into pieces.
Oh I'd LOVE to see you again.
Soon okay? By then, I will memorise all Jason Mraz songs I think.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. |
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| Oh dear, is PMS here? |
[Nov. 19th, 2009|02:36 pm] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| |  cranky | ] |
I am so sick and tired of folks in the office being 'too lazy to leave office because it's too hot/raining' and living off my cigarettes. So today I hid my ciggs and displayed, perhaps a little too proudly, my Butterfly tobacco. Wow suddenly not in demand anymore? FUCK ALL OF YOU, THAT'S WHY.
My boss was being a total dick today, keep asking me to rush the attendance, and questioning my colleague why I haven't done it. Well, if your stupid managers could hand me things on time, maybe I could get things done? And all that calling interrupts my train of thought, HOW THE FUCK DO I FINISH WORK? Get this, he keeps calling when he's ON THE WAY to the office. He can obviously say what he needs to WHEN HE GETS TO THE OFFICE, but nooooooo, he makes my life hell on earth. Stupid dickhead.
While obviously stressed up updating the attendance, I still have to attend to walk-in interviews. ON TOP OF THAT, Ops give me things to do, perhaps just PURE BLIND that I'm busy, and Mr Dickhead, he chases me for stationery order list, his plane ticket and binding of his stupid booklet.
I ate lunch at the stairs, because it was raining but I didn't want to stay in office even though I brought packed food. I walked in the rain because I had to drop off a cheque. I am sitting here, seething still, because I just hate being in close proximity of assholes.
It also doesn't help that I see declarations of love on my Facebook live feed. It makes me want to start throwing random things at random people. ARGH. |
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| Daydreaming is a valid hobby |
[Nov. 18th, 2009|10:47 am] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| | ditzy | ] |
I daydream a lot.
A LOT LOT.
The excuse is that it makes me sane. I guess it does, in some way or another. Life in fantasy isn't always awesome though, because I usually pack a punch by adding some drama and at times, my daydreams take on a life of its own and spins out of control.
It's a different story altogether when my daydreams turn into reality. If you're lucky to catch me mouth gaping wide (rather fish-like actually), yep, that's me watching my daydreams come to life.
It's one thing about obsessing and daydreaming, it's another thing when I'm living it.
Like last week, my goodness, it was like triple whack of my biggest daydreams and fantasies.
Monday. Friday. Sunday.
Can I just call that the best week of the fucking year already?
If you know me well, my dreams don't quite centre around money and having infinite of it. Yeah sure money buys a lot of things, gives you great power, bla bla bla but it's 2nd on my interest list. And no I never ever quite daydream of a perfect holiday, even though I actually like beach holidays. I don't quite like the sun and all that lying on the beach tans me and I don't like it.
I daydream about boys.
Boys I cannot have, boys I'd rather not have, because it will just spoil everything!
Daydreams aren't meant to come alive, because they're more awesome the way they are.
I don't dream about handsome unattainable boys. Like the ones on TV or magazine covers. No no no, I'm such a down to earth girl like that. I dream about boys I see on a regular basis, you can call them friends I guess, but oh how I daydream that we were more than that. Hyukhyukhyukhyuk.
I think, this is better than say, 5 years back? When daydreaming could turn into a serious obsession and then lead to me being the psycho stalker. I grew out of it I guess (and trust me I'm quite glad HAHA). Once in a while I allow obsession on Facebook, not as if they'll guess la right.
Like I said, it keeps me sane.
And I like being sane. And happy.
:)
What keeps YOU happy?
What keeps YOU sane?
If it's money then get out of my face. HAHA. |
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| Nasty Monday? |
[Nov. 16th, 2009|10:03 am] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| |  hungry | ] |
$23 worth of cabfare, because a limo cab came by after 15mins of waiting, and flag down was $5 (puas hati call cab kan!). Traffic jams every-fucking-where, especially Airport Rd because of accident in the KPE.
I wasn't even on time.
$23 and late for work on a Monday.
Everybody better get off my case this week because I am going to punish myself for waking up late.
Oh and the icing in the cake?
My boss is already in so the nasi sambal goreng I have to attribute to for being late will have to wait til lunch.
ARGH. |
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| My Mum and Facebook |
[Nov. 16th, 2009|12:36 am] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| |  bored | ] |
My mum told us that she deactivated her Facebook because it was getting to distracting for her at work. She was on a seminar course thingy and she would get very kaypoh to check what her friends are updating. Her friends live all over the world so the time difference would mean that they are doing all of that in the evening, while she at work.
Then she told us that after deactivating her Facebook, her friends started to email her, asking her what wrong they did to her, because she had 'unfriended' them. One even asked another why Siti 'dah tak geng dengan dia'.
Oh and how were were talking about this? Because my mum now is a user of the iPhone. GAH. That was when my brother said, "Let's make a Facebook group: If 5 people join this group, Ibu should give up the iPhone. HAHAHAHAHAHA." She actually got the joke la.
Nothing wrong with my mum being tech-savvy and all, it's healthy I guess, but she complained, "Tapi tak boleh Bluetooth! I can't transfer all my songs!". To which I told her that Macs are anti-piracy and OMG Ibu you can always use a cable!
Makes me want a new mp3 player. But there's nothing wrong with my current one, so I should not be gatal. |
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| OCB |
[Nov. 11th, 2009|04:46 pm] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| | hungry | ] |
OOOPS! Online shopping again, Sal? TSK! Well in my defence, these things cannot be found in SG, therefore I have to 'import them', since I'm not the travelling kind anyway. :DDDDD Anyway, it was like a mini spree pun, pasal G tumpang a few things and we split the shipping cost. I may have bought excessively, but he assured me I can always sell them to folks who need it.
Cannot wait for my purchases to arrive! *rubs hands* Then Smoking Red boleh relek tepi dulu. Nyahahahahahaha.
Giant chicken cutlet tonite with my grlfwennnn! Cannot wait for that too. AKU LAPAR. |
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| About epic fails. Well not quite always. |
[Nov. 8th, 2009|08:39 pm] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| |  nostalgic | ] |
There was Lamebook.
There was FML.
Now there's PhotoshopDisasters.
That's it, I'm saving up for my own laptop. Love will be bought at the next IT show.
P.S. I went for an early dinner with a guy who's in the military (yeah I guess I got sick of the civil servants) and he let slip that his take home is 3.9k and that's 3x more than his friends of the same age who are working with Cisco.
P.P.S. When Abang Gee (one of my fav waiters at one of my fav places) came with the bill of $16.40, he took out $20 to pay. As a test, I fished out $10, and passed it to him. He looked at it and then looked as if he was going to tell me to keep it. But he didn't, he took it anyway. And the change of $3.60? He kept that.
P.P.P.S. Am I being a bitch here? Maybe I am. I did have chicken cutlet while he had prata. And I did somehow flirt my way to making him take me out. Also! I wore one of my kurangajar lowcut tops, but he was visibly directing his attention elsewhere. Trying not to be rude maybe?
In the car back, he tells me that sometimes he goes out on a date with an old friend, who is someone's wife. Alarm bells should be ringing, but I can be partially deaf.
So what do we want in life?
Money and stability.
Or love and sanity. |
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| Lapar siot |
[Nov. 8th, 2009|01:36 am] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| | contemplative | ] |
Woohoo my Saturday may have flown past but it's alright that I'm home because it just means that I didn't spend any money! :DDDDDDDD
I am shit hungry now though, and I am wondering whether I shd hit the coffee shop pat depan and risk fighting with the mamak again because of his inconsistent prices. I could cook something up but the thought of washing up just makes me lemau again.
I have been thinking this for like 3 hours now.
I really should go back to to sleep.
Oh yes btw, I caught up on all the sleep I missed, because today I was practically a zombie who sleepwalked to work and back.
If I buy food, I will spend money. I will buy food and delicious melon milk from 7-11. Hmmmm.
I think I'll go back to sleep. |
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| SHIT. |
[Nov. 6th, 2009|03:32 pm] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| | in panic | ] |
My colleague Hassan said I'm putting on weight because my face looks rounder.
HOLY SHIT.
I'm going on laxatives tonight onwards.
This takboleh jadi.
AT ALL. |
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| I teared. Like, again. |
[Nov. 6th, 2009|11:34 am] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| |  busy | ] |
Innocently doing my work when Def Leppard's Love Bites plays on the radio.
"When you make love, do you look in the mirror?
Who do you think of?
Does he look like me?
Do you tell lies?
And say that it's forever?
Do you think twice, or just touch and see?
Ooh babe
Oh yeah
When you're alone, do you let go?
Are you wild and willin', or is it just for show?"
No prizes for correctly guessing who this reminds me of.
Always a rawkstar.
Always my rawkstar.
Always on my mind. |
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| BoomTribe Radio |
[Nov. 5th, 2009|09:18 pm] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| | bored | ] |
Sortof rainy, cold night and I'm sitting at home, in my room, basking in yellow light, with BoomTribe Radio playing. Carribean music at night! So nice. iTunes radio is truly genius. It's actually making it difficult to peel myself away from my bed to go cook something for work tmrw and perhaps for dinner.
That's all.
For I realised that the above paragraph actually sounded pretty sad. |
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| Work related (and a quick one at that) |
[Nov. 5th, 2009|10:45 am] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| | productive | ] |
I find it so fucking amusing that after I left the office yesterday evening, the boys couldn't print anything because..
..THEY DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO LOAD PAPER INTO THE PRINTER.
I feel so damn useful and needed lor. Huahuahua.
Mr Asshole, after his stupid uncalled for MC yesterday is back. I am going to HAUNT him for all the oustanding things he owes me and is causing backlog. ASSHOLE.
Ok have a nice day everyone! |
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| Here's another pointless one! |
[Nov. 3rd, 2009|01:31 pm] |
I had a badddddddd lunch. Black Pepper Udon. It was bad. Like badass bad. So bad that now I just feel like going home to sleep away all this badness. NYAHAHAHAHAHAHA mepek.
Ok seriously, this week is mutating from bad to worse. And it's only Tuesday.
I shall go home and sleep all this badness away tonight!
Bye |
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| Monday = Sleepy |
[Nov. 2nd, 2009|09:24 am] |
| [ | i'm feelin! |
| |  sleepy | ] |
Is it just me, or this Monday doesn't quite feel like Monday?
Painted my nails what I thought would be kinda cool colours but how many times can I forget that blue is not quite my colour?? Get this, they are purple and turquoise. Didn't turn out quite as awesome as my pink and red combi. Nyeh.
I am sleepy, understand? I was sleepy when I painted my nails. I slept at 4.30am because I was up to no bloody good with the webcam HEHEHEHEHE.
Hokay, what's in for the week? Saving money yesssssssss! Today for lunch I will be having YUMMEH salad that my sis brought back from me. Ceasar salad okay. So nice. Even nicer pasal free because my sister loves me. LOL. Looking forward to that for lunch today, yes I am.
And then, I'm also looking forward to midweek because I'm making something awesome happen.
Then end of the week because something else that's fun will also be happening.
I know what these are but I cannot tell youuuuuuuuu hahahahahahaha.
Alrighty, I need to get my limbs and brain moving. I also need to do laundry when I get home later because I am running out of clothes to wear to work. Catch u later guys. |
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| It was. |
[Nov. 1st, 2009|04:07 pm] |
The problem with being in a relationship for 2.5 years, only to have it go wrong, is the tumultuous road to recovery. Sure 2.5 years ago, I didn't know it was going to come out sour, and thus explains the 9038492894329 photos/videos in my hard disk. They should be deleted forever, but I can't even bring myself to do that.
The worst, I feel, dating a rawkstar, is the music. Daddy plays the music he loves. My favourite radio stations play the songs he sings to. The songs that remind me of episodes and phases of our time. The music I listened to and we'd discuss. The music he listened to and I'd grow accustomed to.
What brings this entry about? I heard Simply Red's If You Don't Know Me By Now. It's back to 2006 I go. I was 21, I met my rawkstar, I took his advice to listen to my gut feel, and look where I am now. But I don't regret. It was fun. |
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